My parents always looked like they loved being together. That's what I took from them, and that's how my wife and I are. I still feel like we're dating.

Performing was how I was able to release this pain I had.

Losing my parents, who I admired, loved and needed, it took a long time to be able to move on.

All that time, you go, 'God, am I slipping away here?' And then something great happens, you get a call, and work begets more work.

You don't want to wait for that aged jockey role.

We're in this together. We are Americans. We all have to do the best we can. And we will because that's who we are.

President Clinton knew the course and goes, 'Here's what you want to do here.' By the fourth hole, you wanted to hit him with your putter.

It took five years to get 'Parental Guidance' made, and it was a fight every second.

That's the thing that I'm really most proud of: that I'm still... people still would like to see me. I love seeing them.

I'm proud that I have done so many different kinds of things and maintained an amazing family. And I think that's the joy: that I've been able to have everything.

Two things I really wanted to be: a stand-up comic or a New York Yankee - or a really funny New York Yankee.

I've never looked at - with the exception of little snippets - very much of anything I've done in the last 15, 20 years.

As I sit here writing and look across the room at Janice, I keep thinking of the most heartbreaking question: which of us will go first?

I can't bear to think of life without Janice. I want to go first because I don't want to miss her, because that would be a pain far worse than any death.

When you're 65, you're surprised by what turns you on.

My mum, Helen, was hilarious. She had a tremendous sense of humour and was a great singer and tap dancer. For many years, she was the voice of Minnie Mouse in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. She would be in the float as it came along, singing whatever the Minnie Mouse song of the day was. She was a really big spirit in my life.

One night, I wrote down all the things I was waiting to do with my little granddaughter, and it became a book, 'I Already Know I Love You.' It was one of those really lovely things in life.

My girls turned out great.

I think it's like a relay race. You run, and you hand over the baton, and your kids pick it up. They take the stuff they want, throw the rest away, and keep running. That's what life is about.

The decision-making process was very difficult: is this how I want my career to start, with playing Jodie Dallas on this show?

Your first friends are your truest friends, I find. And the ones that stick are really special.

No disrespect to Sweden: I didn't think of them as the comedy universe.

When you're the host of the Academy Awards, and you grew up watching Bob Hope and Johnny Carson, and now it's your turn, and you get a chance to run with the baton on the relay for a while, I really embraced it and just really loved being there.

I was a good baseball player. I still play a couple of times a week as part of my daily workout. Just throwing the ball, running around, fielding ground balls, you know. It's better to me than being on a treadmill or some sort of Zumba class.

When I first started, there were, like... two or three critics that you thought, 'Alright, I hope I get a good review from them.' And now there's millions of them.

I started writing in 1948 - basically.

I have performed my one-man show '700 Sundays' over 400 times now. There were only two times that I can honestly say I was nervous. The first was when I knew Mel Brooks was in the audience, and the second was when Sid Caesar came.

The death of Sid Caesar on Wednesday caused a chain reaction in my soon-to-be-66-year-old mind. I was saddened, of course, but felt a sense of relief that he was at last free from the indignity of aging.

The truth is, in this age of Instagram and Facebook and Snapchat, we know way too much about athletes - and it's their fault.

I love Mickey Mantle. Would I have felt the same if I had known when I was eight years old what I know now?

Well, the way things are going, aside from wheat and auto parts, America's biggest export is now the Oscar.

That's the thing about jazz: it's free flowing, it comes from your soul.

Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I'd always go off book and start improvising.

Bambi, to a kid, was scary.

To be good, you need to believe in what you're doing.

Nobody is more truthful when he's acting than De Niro.

I can't be funny if my feet don't feel right.

Gentlemen, start your egos.

Change is such hard work.

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.

I'm comfortable being old... being black... being Jewish.

My granddaughter's birth has made me want to create things she will love.

From the first time I saw Sid Caesar be funny I knew that's what I had to do.

At 60, I could do the same things I could do at 30, if I could only remember what those things are.

Humans love sex, we need sex, it's how we connect, it reminds us we're alive, it's the third most basic human need, after food and good movie popcorn.

I'd like to think there is a Heaven, and it starts from the happiest day in your life.

My grandparents invented joylessness. They were not fun. I've already had more fun with my grandchildren than my grandparents ever had with me.

You have to really respect what your kids are doing with their kids and how they're raising them. You can't push your way into areas where you shouldn't be saying anything. You have to always remember they're not your own kids. Play with them, love them, spoil them to death - then hand them back.

Kids need a happy household. They need to be loved and supported in their dreams. And I don't think you can make your kids' dreams your own. They need you to support them in their dreams.

Dad had a music store, and he'd often bring home comedy albums that I would listen to. I started listening to Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby, and developing taste. They really influenced my style of comedy.