"I never thought about what people would say about me. I was just a young guy who was excited to become a comedian and an actor, and I just wanted to get to do what I got to do."

"I grew up cursing a lot."

"I've been called a moron since I was about four. My father called me a moron. My grandfather said I was a moron. And a lot of times when I'm driving, I hear I'm a moron. I like being a moron."

"I definitely connected to the fact that life gets out of control and you end up doing things and wishing you were doing other things instead."

"Sometimes you can't prioritise family and you feel guilty."

"I'm filthy rich!"

"I was raised by a mother who told me I was great every day of my life."

"I'm not great at bedtime stories. Bedtime stories are supposed to put the kid to sleep. My kid gets riled up and then my wife has to come in and go, 'All right! Get out of the room.'"

"I've always had lots of friends and my house was the house they all hung out at."

"Kids end up seeing my movies anyway but some of the mothers get mad at me so I figured I'd make one that I can't get yelled at for."

"I can handle pain."

"My father used to wear the same pants for like a week."

"Girls are soft and pretty."

"It's nice when little teams win."

"I prefer musicals, because I am the best dancer who ever lived. The best plies, the best sashays, and by far the best-smelling Capezios."

"When I do stand-up shows at colleges, girls will talk to me after the show, and that always feels good. I like talking to them."

"How do I speak Spanish? Not too well."

"In one day, I have times where I'm feeling great, I feel like I love my life, and then 2:30 rolls around and I'm the angriest man alive. My wife sees it."

"My grandmother used to embarrass me more, when she would pick me up from school wearing a big fuzzy hat. I didn't like that."

"SNL is a home. You've got all of your brothers and sisters there, and it's a great time."

"I grew up cursing a lot. It felt natural. My parents told me to stop."

"I've always liked older ladies, ever since my mother would have B'nai B'rith at our house."

"As a kid, I'd go into the bathroom when I was having a tantrum. I'd be in the bathroom crying, studying myself in the mirror. I was preparing for future roles."

"I like sitting and writing with my buddies."

"In high school I wanted to be a rock star and was in a lot of bands."

"I'll continue to make the typical Adam Sandler comedies."

"When I'm around the kids I feel like I act the most grown-up just because you're supposed to. And I say things, like every other day, that remind me of my own parents."

"Sir one more comment like that and I will strangle you with my microphone wire!"

"A lot of critics object to what I do, but I got into comedy to make people laugh, and I've always worked hard."

"Well, we're living in a material world, and I'm a material girl... or boy."

"The problem with me, as far as getting married and having a family, is that my comedy is so important to me. So I don't know if I'll ever be as good a dad as my dad."

"I still get very scared when I step in front of a live audience."

"Feels good to try, but playing a father, I'm getting a little older. I see now that I'm taking it more serious and I do want that lifestyle."

"I'm not looking to get away from anything. I like what I've done. I like what I get to do and I enjoy working with my friends. I loved those movies, but this is incredible."

"When I was younger and did a stand-up gig, it would take me two weeks to recover. Sometimes I'd get so panicked that I would stutter."

"I sang a song at my sister's wedding. My mother forced me into that, too. But that one felt all right."

"We just bought this house. It's too big. It's like 400,000 square feet, or something. We got an indoor lake and ski slope in the house! It's just too big."

"I think the reason I don't read is because, when I'm reading, I feel like I'm missing out on something else. You know, What are my friends doing? Where's my girlfriend?"

"Most of the stuff I do on the show comes out of me just trying to make my friends laugh."

"I was just a young guy who was excited to become a comedian and an actor and I just wanted to get to do what I got to do."

"My comedy is different every time I do it. I don't know what the hell I'm doing."

"I don't know what drives me to succeed."

"When the kids are laughing in the audience, I tear up, I'm so happy I did a nice thing."

"I shouldn't be near Vegas and have money in my pocket."

"When I'm up there, and I know the show's coming to a close, in my head I'm saying to myself, Oh man, you gotta get off and be a normal person again. That's what I don't like so much."

"I'm 31 now. I think I'm beginning to understand what life is, what romance is, and what a relationship means."

"I never had a speech from my father 'this is what you must do or shouldn't do' but I just learned to be led by example. My father wasn't perfect."

"I wasn't a kid growing up thinking, 'One day I'll get an Oscar and make a speech.' That wasn't on my mind."

"Sixth grade was a big time, in my childhood, of hoops and friendship, and coming up with funny things."

"With the amount of money I have, it's difficult raising children the way I was raised."