"Women and elephants never forget."

"The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt."

"Hollywood money isn't money. It's congealed snow, melts in your hand, and there you are."

"[On the ringing of her doorbell or telephone:] What fresh hell is this?"

"Telegram to a friend who had just become a mother after a prolonged pregnancy: Good work, Mary. We all knew you had it in you."

"Bewildered is the fox who lives to find that grapes beyond reach can be really sour."

"I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them."

"Well, there are always those who cannot distinguish between glitter and glamour . . . the glamour of Isadora Duncan came from her great, torn, bewildered, foolhardy soul."

"What ever beauty may be it has for its basis order and for its essence unity Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone."

"[On hearing that Clare Boothe Luce was invariably kind to her inferiors:] And where does she find them?"

"The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires."

"Writing well is the best revenge."

"Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker."

"Now, look, baby, 'Union' is spelled with 5 letters. It is not a four-letter word."

"There's a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words."

"This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn't touch a superlative again with an umbrella."

"The cleverest woman on earth is the biggest fool on earth with a man."

"That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say 'No' in any of them."

"Ducking for apples -- change one letter and it's the story of my life."

"Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!"

"The affair between Margot Asquinth and Margot Asquinth will live as one of the prettiest love stories in all literature."

"Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair."

"Where unwilling dies the rose; buds the new another year."

"They tire of quiet, that have known the storm"

"Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses."

"I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending."

"People ought to be one of two things, young or dead."

"Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common."

"[After she and Clare Boothe Luce met in a doorway and the latter said, 'Age before beauty':] Pearls before swine."

"Salary is no object: I want only enough to keep body and soul apart."

"If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised."

"I might repeat to myself . . . a list of quotations from minds profound - if I can remember any of the damn things."

"Excuse me, everybody, I have to go to the bathroom. I really have to telephone, but I'm too embarrassed to say so."

"His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets."

"Constant use had not worn ragged the fabric of their friendship."

"The writer's way is rough and lonely, and who would choose it while there are vacancies in more gracious professions, such as, say, cleaning out ferryboats?"

"And if my heart be scarred and burned, The safer, I, for all I learned."

"Most good women are hidden treasures who are only safe because nobody looks for them."

"If I didn't care for fun and such, I'd probably amount to much, but I shall stay the way I am, because I do not give a damn."

"[On being shown an apartment by a real estate agent:] Oh, dear, that's much too big. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends."

""Her "mind lives tidily, apart from cold and noise and pain. And bolts the door against her heart, out wailing in the rain."

"It may be that this "It may be that this autobiography [Aimee Semple McPherson's] is set down in sincerity, frankness, and simple effort. It may be, too, that the Statue of Liberty is situated in Lake Ontario."autobiography [Aimee Semple McPherson's] is set down in sincerity, frankness, and simple effort. It may be, too, that the Statue of Liberty is situated in Lake Ontario."

"Where's the man that could ease a heart like a satin gown?"

"Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away."

"Hollywood is the one place on earth where you could die of encouragement."

"A list of authors who have made themselves most beloved and therefore, most comfortable financially, shows that it is our national joy to mistake for the first-rate, the fecund rate."

"Said after she had been seriously ill: The doctors were very brave about it."

"Why, after all, should readers never be harrowed? Surely there is enough happiness in life without having to go to books for it."

"All I have to be thankful for in this world is that I was sitting down when my garter busted."

"Drink and dance and laugh and lie, Love, the reeling midnight through, For tomorrow we shall die! (But, alas, we never do.)"