"One of the first things I ever did was 'Critical Condition.' That was before 'Full House.' It was a Richard Pryor movie. I didn't have a giant part, but I was in it throughout. I loved the heck out of it."

"Like with any good art form, if you can entertain people and make them think, it's an honor. It's just an honor to be a comedian."

"The whole thing for me is that I did 'Full House' and 'America's Funniest Home Videos,' and I look like a dentist, and I'm a dad. Being known as a dirty comedian turned into this weird thing. It's people's image of me."

"There's just something about the audiences in Detroit that I've always felt connected to. Detroit is different."

"I think things just happen to people. That's healthier, I feel, than believing there's some grand scheme where your story is already inscribed in the Book of Life. Books get rewritten."

"Now I've literally become neighborhood watch. I call 911 on people. I'm the old man driving 25-miles-per-hour down Sunset."

"I had enough therapy to know when I broke it down, it became clearer to me: Yes, comedy was kind of a cleansing thing for me to do."

"It's still a soft R, but when I watch other people's standup, I'm dumbfounded that people call me dirty. That's only because I did family television."

"I really love standup because it's something that I've been literally doing for 40 years, which means I'm a thousand years old."