I can't remember ever cooking food to impress a woman. The idea's quite cheesy and sort of makes my skin crawl. But I sometimes make a special effort to impress my cats, with chicken liver or something. It's tricky to know if a cat's impressed. They might give me a little look, a glimpse at least. That's cat ownership for you.

I used to like getting cups and putting tiny bits of food and liquids in them. I'd grow mould plumes in the dark wardrobe of my little back bedroom. Not to eat them, mind - just to admire the growing power.

I eat a tin of sardines every day.

You know the thing I liked about fishing when I was 14 was being out with your mates mucking about, throwing bread around, getting a bit wet maybe.

I am increasingly of the mind that all fat is good.

I don't think old posh is as intimidating as new posh, is it?

I wouldn't wish it on people but there is a positive side to a near-death experience. People used to ask me do you fancy doing this or that - and it was like I had a file of reasons in my head for not doing things. I would riffle through it until I found one. But I've dropped that.

I don't fish but had always wanted to after doing it as a kid.

I have always been a bit of a recluse, but I really was after the heart thing. And everyone knew.

My doctor told me that I would have had a heart attack on stage.

I go on 'Sunday Brunch' and Simon Rimmer's mashed potato is like heaven.

I am allowed one matchbox-sized piece of cheese a week.

I come from the era when that continental stuff, the skimmed yogurt and a croissant, was a healthy start to the day.

After my triple bypass I got my sheet of healthy and unhealthy foods and I was like, croissants!?! Literally as bad as lard.

We live very ordinary lives.

Throughout my entire three years at Sussex I never spoke to another law student. I talked in tutorials but as soon as they finished I was away back to my room to listen to my records.

It can be very lonely knowing that you have things to say but you daren't say them. Knowing that you could contribute to something but you don't dare quite do it.

When you've had a heart thing, a lot of the problems are psychological.

After heart surgery you can go two ways, you can kind of get scared, shrink on to your sofa and keep yourself safe, or you can engage with life again. I probably was in danger of taking the first option.

I don't think 'Shooting Stars' has ever successfully been replaced.

I sometimes wonder, with the Oxbridge comics, the broadcasters seem to say, at some point, now I trust you to do a documentary, you can be the voice for a maths show, or whatever. I don't think we're ever considered in that way.

In broadcasting, there's a lot of longevity offered to people like Griff Rhys Jones and Stephen Fry, who are polymaths more than comics. We're comics first and foremost.

With everything, 'Shooting Stars' included, we'll just have some words on a card to prompt us - 'How would Rod Stewart die,' that kind of thing - and we'll just run with that idea, as if we were talking to each other, messing around. And I'm no scholar of these things, but I think that's what double acts should do, isn't it?

We've ignored audiences all these years. We've just amused ourselves and hoped enough people would want to eavesdrop to make it all viable.