Comedy Quotes
Find one of the best and famous quote catagorized into topics like inspirational, motivations, deep, thoughtful, art, success, passion, frindship, life, love and many more.
Whatever it is that's bothering me - interacting with annoying guy at a restaurant, contemplating my age, or losing friends to illness - I'll start to chip away at it. If you can poke holes in it, it's not as formidable; it's not as scary, and ultimately, it becomes another truth.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
What life throws at you - you just have to learn how to hit it, which is a baseball metaphor. The ball's outside, you hit to the right. You don't let them go by.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
My older brother Joel became an art teacher; my brother Rip ultimately became a television producer and singer and actor himself.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I never stopped believing in us, and I never felt like I was wanting for anything, except for my father, and that was not going to be.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I never felt I had my 15, 16, 17 kind of years the way I maybe should have. It's a huge dent in you that it's hard to knock out and make it all smooth again.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I'd stand on a coffee table, and my cousin Edith would give me dimes, and you put the dimes on your head... And when your forehead was full, show was over.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I'm almost shocked that I'm still around after all of these years... and always grateful that I get another turn to do something.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I was always looking for something else to do most of the time, until I got into the acting program. Then, I really found myself.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I really could've been a good student, but I was always hearing an imaginary audience.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
We're seeing this disintegration of the family movie into these blockbuster things that kids should not be exposed to with explosions, carnage and violence.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
That's still the greatest high, that feeling of being in control of 2,000 people. It's me and them, and I like the odds. It's not even so much the funny. It's getting them quiet. In the quiet moments in '700 Sundays,' I just really love that they're getting moved.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
My Aunt Sheila was terrifying! She would put a napkin in her mouth and say, 'You've got something on your face, dear. Let me just scratch that off your face. Let me sand your cheek.'
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I still don't love the darkness, though I've learned to smile in it a little bit, now and then.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
Our professor was Marty Scorsese. Marty was a graduate student, or Mr. Scorsese, which is what I had to call him, and still do when I see him 'cause he gave me a C.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
That whole concept of 'I want to really go after people' - I don't understand that. Is it a roast, or is it an awards show?
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I never missed a birthday. I never missed a school play. We carpooled. And the greatest compliment I can ever get is not about my career or performance or anything; it's when people say, 'You know, your girls are great.' That's the real thing for me.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I went to my first game May 30, 1956, and Mantle was in the beginnings of his Triple Crown season. And he was drop-dead handsome.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
To this day, with all of these muscle-bound guys, nobody hit the ball further than Mickey Mantle, with his natural strength.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
When I was about 21 and just about to get out of college at NYU, Vietnam was raging, and I was a frustrated musician for a little bit.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I pride myself in being able to survive just about any situation on stage now. I can handle pressure.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
Since I got into the movies, 'Running Scared,' that did $40 million. 'Princess Bride,' I got good reviews for the character Miracle Max. 'Memories of Me' didn't do well. 'Throw Mama from the Train' did $70 million. 'Harry and Sally' did 95 or 96. 'City Slickers' did $120 million.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
Of course my uncle was a giant, but my dad, in particular, had the house filled with these great Dixieland jazz stars, really the best of them: Henry Red Allen, Willie 'The Lion' Smith, Buster Bailey, Cutty Cutshall, Tyree Glenn, Zutty Singleton. These are all big names in the Dixieland world.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I've said, I never thought I rebelled. I never - I don't think I've ever had that period. You know, I just had to do what I had to do. You know, I was a good kid.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I don't know what I would have done to rebel. I don't know what I was rebelling against.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I don't like to watch my work after I do it because it just - I'll always look at the wrong things.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
Time scares me: having enough time to do all the things that I want to do in life, just even in terms of forgetting about the business I'm in.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
There are all these things I want to accomplish. We never know how long we're going to get.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
There used to be that you only had four or five critics that you would look to for intelligent conversation, but now there are millions of people who can just press 'send,' and everyone's got an opinion even if no one cares what they say. It makes things a little bit tougher.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
People are always telling you you're done. Someone's always telling you that, especially now in the day of social media.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I watch old 'Truth or Consequences' on Hulu. 'Concentration.' And 'The Match Game' with Gene Rayburn.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
As far as the media goes, I'm driving in the left lane at 28 miles an hour.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
It's like being a gym rat, but you're a theater rat, and then that becomes your fraternity house. That becomes your extended family.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
I don't go to any of the big Academy parties while the show is on because, invariably, it turns to people watching me watch the host, and it's not comfortable. I watch at home and hope the show gets to be really good.
Quote by -Billy Crystal
My parents always looked like they loved being together. That's what I took from them, and that's how my wife and I are. I still feel like we're dating.
Quote by -Billy Crystal