Although it sounds very trite, I wish people were nice.

The first time I was on Letterman, I was, like, 20 years old, and I was on a show called 'Camping with Barry White Night.'

I always just felt more comfortable just kind of hiding behind a character than being myself onstage.

I think, like, in real life, I'm actually quiet, and I mumble a lot. But that's not very lucrative.

Sometimes the wheels just fall off a relationship.

I'm always wondering, if Bigfoot's not real, then why does this creature show up in all these different cultures? I'm always fascinated by that kind of stuff.

Even when I was a kid - I was really young - I was drawn to comedy.

I really like and admire Michael Moore.

I had a standup act, and I ended up turning it into something that was really watered down and accessible. Something that went from scary and threatening to something that was almost to the point of being corny.

If I ever got to do television, I would be interested in doing different kinds of characters and stories, and television doesn't lend itself to that.

I'd still like to work with Woody Allen.

I've been known to high-five, and I have a soft spot for Green Day.

The environment on the sets of the movies I make, it's usually all friends and people that know each other, because no one's getting rich or making money, so it's always about, hopefully, that everyone's on the same page.

My wife and daughter both bust me on how much I am the guy yelling at kids to get off my lawn.

If you raise a cool adult, that's an achievement.

Being shocking and cruel is a commerce. It's an actual valued skill now. The thing that really annoys me, the perception of it is that it takes intelligence, and it doesn't.

All I do is I have this insulated life with my wife and my daughter and a couple of friends who I try to see, but it doesn't even happen.

I had fame and wealth and things that are supposed to make you happy, but I wasn't happy, because there's no importance on having a fulfilling life. So in my mid-40s, that was my pursuit - making films that interested me, films that I would like to go see.

When I was at my most outrageous and destructive, I alienated almost everybody.

The movies I make, I never see them as accurately portraying a life, but more like fables.

In the past, the movies I've made are perceived as dark, but a lot of comedies are way darker.

I don't get too hung up on what people think of me.

Every week, there's a different equivalent of Charlie Sheen having a breakdown. I knew about Kim Kardashian getting married - and then getting divorced - and there's no reason I should. I don't have hostility toward Kim Kardashian - just toward the people who take that stuff seriously.

Which is worse - being a has-been or being the guy interviewing a has-been?