I get bored really fast.

People say that Americans trends are transient, but the one activity we never seem to tire of is being outraged. Boy, do we love it!

I unloaded trucks for a living and I hated it.

Wherever I go, there is definitely my audience. I would say in some places there's more of them than others, but it's one advantage to performing for a long time and building up kind of a reputation with a certain crowd.

Communicate and just be open with each other. Have an unpleasant talk once in a while so it does not turn into a festering resentment, which is inevitable. It has happened with every girlfriend I have ever had.

I am a really bad boyfriend.

The one curse in America is that we deny who we really are and what we like.

Trevor Noah is a great, relevant young comic, and Comedy Central is smart to stand by him.

I am a degenerate, and I know that.

My job is to be funny.

It's really the old question: Does art inspire life or does life inspire art? Maybe it's a combination of both. But Trump represented something. He didn't create what we are. He comes from what we are. And he's a representative of what we are, whether we like it or not. He's just not our better nature.

You can't worry about saying something that will get you in trouble because the line changes so fast. If you try to navigate it, you will not only suck but eventually say something stupid and get yourself dumb anyway.

Google is not my friend. I've been way too open in my career. Google has killed any shot I have on the dating apps.

You can't apologize for who you are on a stage, you can reveal who you are but don't apologize because that's begging the audience to turn on you.

I like to keep busy, because otherwise I'd be languishing by myself.

I hate a well-lit room.

There are just some things that I don't think jokes are good for.

You know, Americans think that they're such progessive and free thinkers, but we're as uptight as any other country when it comes to speech and language and content.

It's nice to have funny friends. I like watching my friends perform.

Anyone who can't tell the difference between a joke and hate speech is just stupid.

Realize that doing comedy is only going to make your depression worse.

I always wore a hat. They were gonna throw me out of high school because I wouldn't take my hat off. But it was just a deep insecurity about my awful hair.

To me the important thing for a comic to be is emotionally honest.

The image people have of comedians staring defiantly over a stationary line of good taste is simply inaccurate. We don't approach this line, put our toes over it arrogantly and then scamper back to safety. The line doesn't exist.