Our attitudes are fostered by a society built on ideas of dominance, where the solution to crises are force and action, rather than reflection and compromise.

In times of crisis, we are made to feel we should scrutinise our government's actions less closely, when surely that's when we should pay closest attention.

Perhaps we've got so involved in the false selves we project on social media that we've forgotten that our real selves, our private selves, are different, are worth saving.

Somehow, I always imagine that Trump spends the evenings with his forehead pressed against the cold glass of an aquarium, talking telepathically to the tormented albino squid in which he has hidden his soul.

Creationists have often made me doubt evolution, but probably not in the way they think.

If leadership is about listening, the great political speeches would have been a little different.

Of course, it's absurd that we trust the Tories with our day-to-day reality, as so many of them don't really inhabit it. Why elect people to run our schools and hospitals who choose not to go to those schools and hospitals?

Admittedly, the Conservatives are generally more persuasive orators than their Labour counterparts, perhaps a skill developed by spending school holidays trying to lure father out from behind his Daily Telegraph.

I'm totally off any caffeine now.

Corbyn sounds like a dreadful town, dresses like a catalogue model for the Sue Ryder shop and won't look significantly different when he's been dead for a week.

If I ever get to meet Vladimir Putin, I will probably take my top off and challenge him to an erotically charged wrestling match, which I will let him win.

We need to take urgent action on climate change.

I think there is racism at the heart of British policy and has been both in Labour and Conservative times.

The No 1 priority in TV comedy today is 'don't frighten the horses,' and it's probably No 2 and 3 as well.

I think we live in a quite an immoral society with quite an amoral government and they're going to have to grow up in that and negotiate their own way in it.

People feel much more comfortable with the 'Fifty Shades of Grey' version of women's liberation: possibly feeling life would be much simpler if the suffragettes hadn't wanted the vote and just really enjoyed chaining themselves to railings.

There are a lot of problems with democracy. We need to think about how to find the people most qualified for the job.

In a lot of farther-flung places in Scotland people are guarded at first, but as soon as they get to know you they really hate you.

I think you have a lot of rich and Conservative people who control our country who are racist and their views trickle down through things like tabloid papers.

Supporting Rangers, being in an Orange Lodge, that whole life - that's a valid culture.

Supporting Celtic, waving a tricolour because your parents are Irish - that's a valid culture.

There's still a lot of racism in stand-up.

I did a ski festival in Austria once. I was struck by how friendly Austrians were, before gradually realising it's more that Glaswegians are awful.

How hard is it to get female panellists?