QUOTES by Will Rogers
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If you hear of anyone proposing my name for political office, please maim him and send me the bill.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.
Quote by -Will Rogers
The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.
Quote by -Will Rogers
The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal they have to live off each other, while the Republicans, why, they live off the Democrats.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Women are not the weak, frail little flowers that they are advertised. There has never been anything invented yet, including war, that a man would enter into, that a woman wouldn't, too.
Quote by -Will Rogers
When you have helped to raise the standard of cooking, you have helped to raise the only thing in the world that really matters. We only have one or two wars in a lifetime, but we have three meals a day -- there's nothing in the world that we do as much as we do eating.
Quote by -Will Rogers
A king can stand people's fighting but he can't last long if people start thinking.
Quote by -Will Rogers
The whole trouble with the Republicans is their fear of an increase in income tax, especially on higher incomes. They speak of it almost like a national calamity. I really believe if it come to a vote whether to go to war with England, France and Germany combined, or raise the rate on incomes of over $100,000, they would vote war.
Quote by -Will Rogers
I will never joke about old soldiers who try to get to reunions to talk over the war again. To talk of old times with old friends is the greatest thing in the world.
Quote by -Will Rogers
There is two things that can disrupt business in this country. One is War, and the other is a meeting of the Federal Reserve Bank.
Quote by -Will Rogers
I originated a remark many years ago that I think has been copied more than any little thing that Ive every said, and I used it in the FOLLIES of 1922. I said America has a unique record. We never lost a war and we never won a conference in our lives. I believe that we could without any degree of egotism, single-handed lick any nation in the world. But we cant confer with Costa Rica and come home with our shirts on.
Quote by -Will Rogers
The only real diplomacy ever performed by a diplomat is in deceiving their own people after their dumbness has got them into a war.
Quote by -Will Rogers
George Bernard Shaw of England stopped over just long enough to make one speech in Bombay, India, started a war and 100 Indians killed each other. That's what I call good speech-making. The only enthusiasm any of our speakers can rouse is a demand to kill the speaker.
Quote by -Will Rogers
You can be killed just as dead in an unjustified war as you can in one protecting your own home.
Quote by -Will Rogers
The French couldn't hate us any more unless we helped 'em out in another war.
Quote by -Will Rogers
I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give everybody a chance to get sore at everybody else. Sometimes it takes two or three conferences to scare up a war, but generally one will do it.
Quote by -Will Rogers
There is one rule that works in every calamity. Be it pestilence, war, or famine, the rich get richer and poor get poorer. The poor even help arrange it.
Quote by -Will Rogers
If you want to know when a war might be coming, you just watch the U.S. and see when it starts cutting down on its defenses. It's the surest barometer in the world.
Quote by -Will Rogers
You can have all the advanced war methods you want, but, after all, nobody has ever invented a war that you don't have to have somebody in the guise of soldiers to stop the bullets.
Quote by -Will Rogers
We are the only nation in the world that waits till we get into a war before we start getting ready for it.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Sure must be a great consolation to the poor people who lost their stock in the late crash to know that it has fallen in the hands of Mr. Rockefeller, who will take care of it and see that it has a good home and never be allowed to wander around unprotected again. There is one rule that works in every calamity. Be it pestilence, war or famine, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. The poor even help arrange it.
Quote by -Will Rogers
You can't say that civilization don't advance; for in every war they kill you a new way.
Quote by -Will Rogers
If you want to know when a war might be coming, you just watch the U.S. and see when it starts cutting down on its defenses. It's the surest barometer in the world.
Quote by -Will Rogers
No nation ought to be allowed to enter into a war until it's paid for the last one.
Quote by -Will Rogers
I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this -- no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.
Quote by -Will Rogers
I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
Quote by -Will Rogers
You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.
Quote by -Will Rogers
This country has gotten where it is in spite of politics, not by the aid of it. That we have carried as much political bunk as we have and still survived shows we are a super nation.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Here's another way of putting it. Roosevelt wants recovery to start at the bottom. In other words, by a system of high taxes, he wants business to help the little fellow to get started and get some work, and then pay business back by buying things when he's at work. Business says, 'Let everybody alone. Let business alone, and quit monkeying with us, and we'll get everything going for you, and if we prosper, naturally the worker will prosper.'
Quote by -Will Rogers
Government spending? I don't know what it's all about. I don't know any more about this thing than an economist does, and, God knows, he doesn't know much.
Quote by -Will Rogers
I don't think either one of them knows what it's all about, to be honest with you. Both sides are doing nothing but just looking towards the next election.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Politics pretty quiet over the week-end. Democrats are attacking and the Republicans are defending. All the Democrats have to do is promise "what they would do if they got in." But the Republicans have to promise "what they would do" and then explain why they haven't already "done it".
Quote by -Will Rogers
If this depression stays with us, the loser Tuesday is going to be the winner.
Quote by -Will Rogers
Course, that's the trouble with politics, it breeds politics! So that makes it pretty hard to stamp out.
Quote by -Will Rogers
And, when the votes are counted, let everybody, including the candidates, get into a good humor as quick as they got into a bad one.
Quote by -Will Rogers
We cuss Congress, and we joke about 'em, but they are all good fellows at heart, and if they wasn't in Congress, why, they would be doing something else against us that might be even worse.
Quote by -Will Rogers
The Senate just sits and waits till they find out what the president wants, so they know how to vote against him.
Quote by -Will Rogers
The "Ways & Means Committee" is a committee that's supposed to find the Ways to divide up the Means.
Quote by -Will Rogers
It's getting so if a man wants to stand well socially, he can't afford to be seen with either the Democrats or the Republicans.
Quote by -Will Rogers