I want to die before my wife, and the reason is this: If it is true that when you die, your soul goes up to judgment, I don't want my wife up there ahead of me to tell them things.

A father . . . knows exactly what those boys at the mall have in their depraved little minds because he once owned such a depraved little mind himself. In fact, if he thinks enough about the plans that he used to have for young girls, the father not only will support his wife in keeping their daughter home but he might even run over to the mall and have a few of those boys arrested.

If I use the word romance, whether it's my wife or not, it does not mean sex. We can use the word sex when sex is there.

With my wife Camille's help, I took to social networking. I'm working with the computers.

My feeling is, personally, I want to die first... because I believe that when you die, your soul goes immediately up for judgment - and I don't want my wife up there first. No, the judgment will be horrendous.

My wife and I have five children. And the reason why we have five children is because we do notwantsix.

My wife and I have five children; the reason we have five children is because we do not want six

Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.

My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

My wife told me if there is any rumors about me, it better be about politics and not about my social life.

My wife doesn't even want to spend 2 hours with me.

We were at a beach one summer, and I had a bathing suit on. My wife looked at me and said: 'Boy, you are skinny, aren't you?' I said: 'Honey, I'd like to remind you that it was minor defects like this that kept me from getting a better wife.'

The greatest king of Israel, King David, the author of the Psalms, sent a man out to die in battle so that he could sleep with his wife.

White men have always controlled their wives' wages. Colored men were not able to do so until they themselves became free. Then they owned both their wives and their wages.

I'm giving serious thought into eating yor wife” - Hannibal Lecter

My beautiful wife is dead. She meant everything to me. Her laughter, her tears and her joy will remain with me the rest of my life.

My wife and my three kids and my grandchildren are my life, but my horses and my dogs are everything else.

A man long accustomed to admire his wife in general, seldom pauses to admire her in a particular gown or attitude, unless his attention is directed to her by the appreciative gaze of another man.

I'm the minority in my house sometimes. My wife is Swedish, and we go to Sweden and everyone is rattling off in Swedish. It's like, 'OK, I can just read a book.'

“Should I ever marry, Watson, I should hope to inspire my wife with some feeling which would prevent her from being walked off by a housekeeper when my corpse was lying within a few yards of her.”

"Please take your time. I want you to kill me slowly so I can write my last poem to my wife's heart. They laughed, and took from me only the words dedicated to my wife's heart."

When a woman is frustrated, and it's your wife, you as the husband get that frustration.

The worst moment from all of this was driving from that doctor's office, to tell my wife that I was HIV positive.