"Most women are not as young as they are painted."

"You will find that the woman who is really kind to dogs is always one who has failed to inspire sympathy in men."

"They couldn't go for her because she was an independent woman."

"America is a friend to the people of Iraq. Our demands are directed only at the regime that enslaves them and threatens us. When these demands are met, the first and greatest benefit will come to Iraqi men, women and children."

"I think I made essential a mistake in staying in movies, because I - but it's a mistake I can't regret, because it's like saying, 'I shouldn't have stayed married to that woman, but I did because I love her.'"

"Whenever a man encounters a woman in a mood he doesn't understand, he wants to know if she's tired."

"A man's wife is his compromise with the illusion of his first sweetheart."

"[He also considered how his sentence on] a young, black woman entertainer ... an older white woman entertainer."

"[The bummer of it all is that Dowd is right about the female need to use aggression only as a stealth weapon. The hazard of hitting the big five-oh and beyond is an erroneous sense that you've earned the right not to play by the same rules. Once the hormonal brakes come off, it's easy to crash.] I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, ... I fell in a hole."

"I think it's pathetic that women and men treat each other worse than we treat our pets. It's love or hate."

"We've been kind of squeezed in the middle there. For the women's game to have its own night gives the media time to give it sufficient coverage."

"Unloved women have no biographies-- they have histories"

"No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves."

"A woman is as old as she looks before breakfast."

"If a woman doesn't chase a man a little, she doesn't love him."

"Men have as exaggerated an idea of their rights as women have of their wrongs."

"Virtue must be valuable, if men and women of all degrees pretend to have it."

"A woman who can't forgive should never have more than a nodding acquaintance with a man."

"My wife always says that I will be stuck with this forever: I am the difficult one. With Jack Nicholson they always said it was drugs. Warren Beatty is supposed to have screwed everything that jumped off the curve. I'll tell you, in reality a few of us had as many girls as Warren."

"There's too many interesting women I have…not had the experience to know in this life because I have been brainwashed."

"A Satin Doll is a woman who is as pretty on the inside as she is on the outside."

"If all the young ladies who attended the Yale promenade dance were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised."

"Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation."

"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."