"I sit in the sky like a sphinx misunderstood; My heart of snow is wed to the whiteness of swans; I hate the movement that displaces the rigid lines, With lips untaught neither tears nor laughter do I know."

"I sit in the sky like a sphinx misunderstood; My heart of snow is wed to the whiteness of swans; I hate the movement that displaces the rigid lines, With lips untaught neither tears nor laughter do I know."

"The best way to make your audience laugh is to start laughing yourself."

"The loud laugh that spoke the vacant mind."

"The malicious sneer is improperly called laughter."

"The biggest fool in the world is he who merely does his work supremely well, without attending to appearance."

"Back before I injured my hip, I thought going to the gym was for wimps."

"I'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh."

"Funny is funny. I dare anyone to look at Tim Conway and Harvey Korman doing the dentist sketch, which is more than 40 years old, and not scream with laughter."

"As far as sitcoms go, I thought Jenna Elfman in 'Dharma and Greg' was a wonderful physical comedienne who had great timing."

"If I go to a party, I'm not one to be the funniest person in the room at all."

"I am not a joke-teller. Stand-up, I couldn't do."

"But I didn't ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn't even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh."

"It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington."

"Edgy is fine - I'm not a prude by any stretch of the imagination - but what's wrong with a good ol' belly laugh? I miss that."

"If you laugh, think, and cry; that's a full day."

"I can't wait to be that age and hanging out with a bunch of people hanging out all day playing golf and going to the beach, all my own age. We'd be laughing and having a good time and getting loopy on our prescription drugs. Driving golf carts around. I can't wait."

"Laugh at yourself and at life. Not in the spirit of derision or whining self-pity, but as a remedy, a miracle drug, that will ease your pain, cure your depression, and help you to put in perspective that seemingly terrible defeat and worry with laughter at your predicaments, thus freeing your mind to think clearly toward the solution that is certain to come. Never take yourself too seriously."

"If I feel depressed I will sing. If I feel sad I will laugh. If I feel ill I will double my labor. If I feel fear I will plunge ahead. If I feel inferior I will wear new garments. If I feel uncertain I will raise my voice. If I feel poverty I will think of wealth to come. If I feel incompetent I will think of past success. If I feel insignificant I will remember my goals. Today I will be the master of my emotions."

"A good laugh is sunshine in the house."

"I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful."

"A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?"

"Laugh at your friends, and if your friends are sore; So much the better, you may laugh the more."

"Laughter is day, and sobriety is night; a smile is the twilight that hovers gently between both, more bewitching than either."